By Leah Caldwell | Parenting and divorce | June 2024

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Can a mother stop the father seeing the child in the UK?

During a divorce or separation, emotions can run high, making it challenging to navigate parental responsibilities. Many separated or divorced parents grapple with questions about their rights, especially regarding one parent stopping the other from seeing their child.

In England and Wales, both parents share the responsibility of raising their child, ensuring the child receives care and attention from both. Family law in England and Wales emphasises the importance of children having meaningful relationships with both parents, as long as it does not risk the child's wellbeing. As a legal principle, therefore, a mother should stop a father from seeing their child without justifiable reason.

This article explores whether a mother can prevent a father from seeing their child, outlining the legal considerations, practical steps, and the role of mediation in resolving such disputes.

For tailored advice, speak to one of our family mediators on 0330 320 7600 or office@mediationfirst.co.uk. Alternatively, you can complete an online contact form.

What rights do fathers have?

Fathers, like mothers, have significant rights and responsibilities concerning their children - these are collectively known as ‘parental responsibility’. Under the law in England and Wales, parental responsibility is automatically granted to the child's mother. Fathers' rights and their parental responsibility can depend on various factors:

• Fathers married to or in a civil partnership with the mother at the time of the child's birth automatically receive parental responsibility.
• Fathers not married to or in a civil partnership with the mother do not hold parental responsibility by default. They can acquire it if they:
  • Are listed on the birth certificate (for births registered after December 1, 2003)
  • Obtain responsibility via a Parental Responsibility Agreement or Order
  • Have a Residence Order (for cases prior to April 2014)
  • Are designated as the primary caregiver for the child under a Child Arrangements Order

If a father has parental responsibility, they have the right to be involved in key decisions about his child's upbringing, education, and welfare.

In cases involving adoption, surrogacy, same-sex parenting, and step-parenting, specific legal provisions determine who gains parental responsibility.

Reasons to stop a father from seeing their child

There are circumstances where a mother may feel justified in preventing the father from having contact with their child. These reasons can include:

• Concerns about the child's safety and wellbeing
• Evidence of abuse or neglect
• Substance abuse issues
• Instances of domestic violence
• Criminal activity

In such cases, it is crucial to approach the matter legally and seek guidance from professionals to ensure the child's best interests are prioritised.

Insufficient reasons to end contact

Conversely, there are reasons that may not be considered sufficient by the courts to stop a father from seeing his child. These can include:

• Personal animosity or unresolved conflicts between parents
• Disagreement on parenting styles
• Financial disputes

Courts generally prioritise the child's right to maintain a relationship with both parents unless there is clear evidence that contact would be harmful.

Can you legally stop the other parent from seeing their child?

Legally, one parent cannot unilaterally stop the other from seeing their child without a court order.

It is always preferable to reach an agreement outside of court with the other parent regarding arrangements for your child. Collaborative agreements tend to be more flexible and amicable, benefiting both parents and the child.

If an agreement cannot be reached, the next recommended step is child mediation, unless it is deemed unsuitable or otherwise unhelpful. The first step in the process is to meet with a family mediator for a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM). In the MIAM, the mediator will discuss your circumstances and consider whether mediation, or other forms of non-court dispute resolution (NCDR), are likely to be appropriate. . Mediation offers a neutral platform for parents to discuss their concerns and work towards a mutually acceptable solution. This process can help avoid the stress and expense of court proceedings.

However, if mediation and/or NCDR is unsuccessful or deemed inappropriate, the court will need to make a decision. The court's primary consideration is the child's welfare. They will evaluate several factors to ensure the arrangement is in the best interests of the child, including:

• The child's welfare, evaluating the child's physical, emotional, and educational needs
• The child's wishes and feelings, depending on the child's age and understanding
• Parental capability to meet the child's needs
• History of abuse or neglect

How can mediation help?

Mediation can play a key role in resolving child arrangement disputes. The process is designed to help parents communicate more effectively and find a solution that works for everyone involved, especially the child.

The mediator will facilitate discussions, helping both parents to communicate effectively and focus on the child's best interests. They provide a structured environment, guiding the conversation and ensuring both parties have a chance to voice their concerns and suggestions. The mediator does not make decisions but helps the parents reach an agreement.

How mediation works:

1. Initial meeting: Each parent meets separately with the mediator for a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM)Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) to discuss their concerns and the issues at hand. The suitability of mediation and other forms of non-court dispute resolution will be explored.

2. Joint sessions: The mediator speaks with both parents together in a neutral setting to discuss and negotiate arrangements. This takes place virtually, allowing you to take part from the comfort of your own home. Multiple sessions may be needed.

3. Child-inclusive mediation: If appropriate, and with the consent of both parents, the child can be involved in the mediation process. This allows the child to express their feelings and wishes in a safe environment. A specially trained mediator will meet with the child separately and bring their views into the discussions in a way that supports the child's best interests.

4. Agreement: Once an agreement is reached, the mediator helps draft a written outcome statement, which can be made legally binding through a court order if both parents agree.

If the child doesn’t want contact with the father

It's not uncommon for a child to express a desire not to have contact with a parent. While this situation is challenging and often upsetting, it's essential to understand the underlying reasons.

In such cases, Child Inclusive Mediation can be highly beneficial. A specialist mediator will meet with the child to understand their feelings and ensure their voice is heard in the decision-making process. This approach helps in addressing the child's concerns constructively and allowing for a more amicable resolution.

Research supports that children who have been given this opportunity have found it to be cathartic and validating to have their voice heard by an independent third party. A recent study found that 90% of children who took part in child inclusive mediation were satisfied with the outcome, mainly because they felt their views were acted upon.

Conclusion

Reaching an agreement on child arrangements through mediation is often the best option for all parties involved. It fosters better communication, reduces conflict, and prioritises the child's wellbeing. However, if mediation fails or is unsuitable, the court will intervene to ensure the child's welfare.

Explore our child mediation services

Child mediation can help you find a balanced and cooperative solution for your child's best interests. Explore our child mediation services today to learn more about how mediation can help you and your child move forward.

For tailored guidance and to explore mediation options, contact us today.

Tel: 0330 320 7600
Email: office@mediationfirst.co.uk.

FAQs

Can a mother stop a father from seeing his child if there is no court order?

No, one parent should not unilaterally stop the other from seeing their child without there being safe-guarding concerns or a court order. It's best to seek advice if there are genuine concerns.

What is a Child Arrangements Order?

A Child Arrangements Order is a court order that sets out who a child will live with, spend time with, or otherwise have contact with. It helps in formalising the child's living and contact arrangements.

How can mediation help in resolving disputes about seeing children?

Mediation provides a neutral environment where both parents can discuss their issues and work towards a mutually acceptable agreement. It is often less adversarial and more cost-effective than going to court.

Do fathers have rights if they are not listed on the birth certificate?

Fathers not listed on the birth certificate do not automatically have parental responsibility. However, they can obtain it through a parental responsibility agreement with the mother or by applying for a court order. Fathers without parental responsibility can still attend mediation and apply to court for a Child Arrangements Order.